Getting to know someone through text is not easy, especially if you don’t know how to start the conversation. This is why it’s important to learn how to start a conversation so that you don’t bore the other person.
If the person you’re chatting with always seems bored, they might not want to hang out in person. They’ll know that you have nothing to say and they’ll want to avoid wasting time with someone who is boring.
Why good conversation always leads to a great connection
What you say in text messages can make others like you more. Being honest and saying all the right things can help a person get to know you better.
A good start to a conversation can build a great chemistry between you and the other person. They’ll be more likely to want to meet in person after you have a good conversation.
Good conversations open the door to a great relationship between you and the other individual. You’ll be able to learn a lot about them during the course of a conversation.
How to make conversation over text and appear exciting and fun
You must learn how to make your text conversations exciting so that you don’t bore your crush. Here are some tips on how to do so.
1. Avoid typical greetings
The typical greeting of “Hello, what’s up?” is not a good way to start a text conversation. It’s likely that the other person will get that message as well. In order to make a good first impression, you need to stand out from the crowd.
Instead, start the conversation with something that’s relevant to the other person. For instance, if you’re talking about a show that both of you are watching, saying “Can you believe that?” can be enough.
2. Begin with a question
A good way to get the other person’s attention is by asking a question. Not only will it get them to think about what you’re trying to say, but it will also make them feel like you’re genuinely interested in them.
It can make them feel significant, and it can increase their liking for you.
3. Don’t be afraid to dig deep
Don’t try to stick to a casual conversation. Instead, ask questions to get to know more about the other person.
A good way to start a deeper conversation is by asking a question. For instance, if the other person is asking about your childhood, you can start by saying something like, “What was your favorite part of being a kid?”
This is a simple yet effective way to reveal something about yourself. It can help the other person feel more comfortable opening up about themselves.
4. Focus on the real conversation
A lot of people approach the other person with the goal of getting them to like them by posing numerous questions.
This method will not get the other person’s attention. It will just make them feel like they are being interviewed.
Don’t stop the conversation if you’re just asking a question. It should continue to progress naturally.
5. Use some emojis when necessary
Emojis can make your texts more engaging. A well-placed emoji can help set the tone for a good text conversation. They can show off your emotions and make the other person feel like they’re being entertained.
6. Let go of dead conversations
Don’t try to revive a dead text conversation. It’s done. You can make things awkward by making them feel bored, as they will no longer want to talk about it. Just end the exchange and start a new one.
7. Talk about things they enjoy
First, start talking about the subject if you’re knowledgeable about the person’s interests. If you’re aware of their love for painting, then open up.
Try to ask them about their preferred type of art, their inspiration, and why they find it so fulfilling. Not only will you be able to show them how much you care about them, but you’ll also get a deeper understanding of their passion.
8. Avoid short replies
You must engage in a substantive conversation to learn how to construct a conversation using text.
When replying to someone after they’ve already talked about something, simply saying “cool” will do nothing to help them work on their message.
9. Ask follow-up questions
During the middle of a text conversation, it’s helpful to ask follow-up inquiries.
If the person gives you their opinion on a certain topic, then ask how they came up with it. This will show them how much you care and will also help keep the conversation going.
10. Talk about controversial issues
A good conversation can last for a long time if you do it right. Although you don’t want to talk about controversial topics, you can still have a good conversation by talking about semi-controversial subjects.
11. Avoid cliché topics of conversation
Weather is not an acceptable topic to talk about. Unless you have an unusual anecdote about a storm that just occurred, do not discuss weather.
You should try to make your conversations unique and avoid topics that other people would be interested in discussing.
12. Use their social media to your advantage
You can also use their social media to find great ideas for a conversation. You can find a lot of interesting topics in their feed.
You can also try to use their social media to find interesting topics in their feed. If they share a post that’s about something that you’re interested in, then you can talk about it.
13. Send them memes you think they’d enjoy
One way to earn brownie points is by making your crush giggle with your funny memes.
Wait for their response and send some funny memes. Make sure you don’t send too many at the same time, or overdo it.
14. Pay attention
When they’re texting you, pay close attention to what they’re saying and tailor your messages to suit their interests.
You must know how to select the most relevant topics for the person in order to initiate a productive and meaningful text conversation.
15. Don’t overthink everything
You’ll panic if you think about what you’re going to say in a text conversation. Instead, try to convey what you feel and avoid trying too hard.
How to change your conversation depending on how well you know them
Following this guide will teach you how to start a conversation and answer long and entertaining questions using text messaging. But there is still something you need to know.
No single method or rule applies to every person you’re texting. For instance, if you’re just starting a conversation with someone, it might be different from chatting up a friend or initiating a follow-up.
Before you start a text conversation, it’s important that you know the person well. This will allow you to determine if the conversation will be natural and how it will feel.
1. Are you texting someone new?
Getting the hang of how to start a text conversation with someone new can be challenging. You may not have the necessary common ground to express why you want to talk to them.
Instead of saying something like, “Hello, what’s up?” try something that will catch their attention and make them think that you’re unique.
After you’ve met up, say hello and introduce yourself. Tell them about a new restaurant that’s located near you, and request that they try its cheese fries.
2. Just want to talk?
If you’re not planning on meeting up, try something a little more interesting or playful. This will allow you to start a more engaging and meaningful conversation.
Sometimes, even simple statements like “I was watching The Office” can be used to start a conversation.
Displaying your interests or hobbies in your initial text message will catch their attention and encourage them to continue the conversation. For instance, you can talk about traveling after stating that you just got back from a weekend away.
3. Are you texting someone from work?
If you’ve recently gotten a friend’s number, it’s easier to reach out to them. You have the necessary common ground to start a conversation.
Try to ask questions about a particular topic or highlight something in your boss’s statement that you missed. You can also ask for notes or bring up a colleague’s statement.
This makes initiating a text conversation less nerve-wracking. It shows that you care about the quality of the conversation.
4. Can you woo a friend?
If you’re in the mood for a good time, try to start a series of very sexy and fun conversations with your potential partner. However, if you’ve got a crush on one of your friends, avoid sending them the same old text message as usual.
Try initiating a subtle flirting conversation. For instance, a compliment such as “You looked great yesterday” may turn the exchange into a less platonic one.
You could also try making them laugh by sharing a meme or a funny article. You could also try making it clear that you want to improve your friendship. For instance, you can send them a list of questions or a BuzzFeed article about being in the friend zone.
5. Want to reach out to the person you’ve been dating?
Getting into a text conversation with someone you’ve only recently started dating can be a bit confusing. Do you go all out like you’re already in a relationship or do you hold back?
Don’t ever say, “Sorry if I’m bothering you.” This statement will show that you are not confident enough in your interactions with others. Even if the person says something like “I’m sorry, busy right now,” respond with a “No worries, talk later.”
Try to remain confident while avoiding being too needy. For instance, start by asking about a topic that you’ve already discussed. This will show that you’re interested in their life.
6. Want to reach out after a fight?
The first text message you send following a fight can be awkward, as you don’t know if the anger has gone away. You also have no idea how to measure the situation or whether you can make a joke out of it.
If you want to start a new text conversation following a fight, an apology is a good place to start. It doesn’t have to be an admission of guilt, just that you want to work things out.
7. Can you start a conversation after radio silence?
A lot of people start a new text conversation with someone after a long time, weeks, months, or years of not talking. The person may either not answer or will start asking where you’ve been all these years.
Instead of hiding anything, try to come clean with the person by saying something like, “Hello, I know that it’s been a long time since we spoke.”
You can start a new text conversation with someone by displaying an old picture or a news item from a favorite TV show. This will make the exchange more natural.
8. Trying to reach out to someone who is ghosting you?
I learned this in my younger years. People tend to want to talk to those who are ignoring them, as they may be interested in learning what happened.
They may try to ignore your rudeness or will they ignore it? If you are going to try and ask them to apologize, you should know that it is not worth it. If they can’t text you, they might not be the person you would want to be with.
9. Do you feel guilty for ignoring someone?
If you’re the ghoster who feels embarrassed about being so rude, it can be awkward to start a text conversation. However, it’s a good thing that you feel bad as it shows that you have a heart.
If you truly feel sorry about how you behaved and want to talk to the person again, then take ownership of the situation. Instead of trying to hide something, tell them that you’re sorry and hope they’ll give you a chance.
10. Are you trying to reconnect with an ex?
You and your ex broke up due to various issues, and unless you have addressed these issues, it is not a good idea to try and reconnect. If you are still trying to get in touch with an ex, then try to be open and sincere.
If you’re still interested in being with the person, then come out and be open. Also, be honest about what you’re feeling for the person.
11. Do you need something?
If you are seeking a favor, then you have to strike a balance between being blunt and kind. Learning how to initiate a text conversation with ease is about subtlety.
You should also be kind to the person and show genuine interest in their current state of affairs. If you wait too long to ask for a favor, it will appear like you are using them.
If you are trying to get a favor, then make an offer in exchange. Do not say that you will give them one. For instance, if you want to help them move their couch, you should say that you would be willing to give them beer and pizza.
12. Are you lonely?
If you are lonely, then don’t text people who have already rejected you. Also, don’t approach those who ghosted you before.
You should avoid initiating a text conversation with an ex or someone you are currently in a situationship with. Doing so will make you feel worse.
If you are struggling with loneliness, then try sending a message to a trusted friend or family member. They can help you feel better and keep you company.
13. Do you have a topic in mind?
If you are not ready to talk about anything, then don’t expect to get in touch with niceties. Instead, start a text conversation with the intention of talking about the topic that you are interested in.
If you are interested in talking about an awkward topic or a sensitive one, then do so. Before you start the text conversation, try to give the person an indication that you want to talk about it.
14. Is it worth it?
If you are planning on initiating a text conversation with an individual that you do not approve of, then it is important to consider the worth of the effort. Before you start the text message, ask yourself why you are doing it and what will happen next.
These are questions that you should ask before initiating a text conversation, particularly with somebody who is not close to you.
15. Are you still too nervous?
A fake out is a less risky approach if all else fails. If you are scared that you might get ghosted or rejected, then you can try sending a message to a sibling.
This approach works by saying something like, “We’re out of milk,” or “I don’t know, ask mom.” This could be an icebreaker or a way to open up a new conversation. They will likely know that it’s not for them, but it could also lead to a new interaction.
Now you know how to start a text chat, it’s time to get to it
You have all the necessary skills to start a text conversation and keep it going. Just ignore your nerves and start talking to the person. You never know, it could lead to a real face-to-face meeting.
With the advent of texting and the way people nowadays interact with each other, learning how to initiate a text conversation is essential! Follow these simple steps and begin sending your first message, it will be as effortless as it sounds.